“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things“
I hope I am not taking this out of context, but she is all of the above.
So am I a dope, fool, or scab for holding on to hope? Am I the dorky teenager with braces that is at the end of his driveway in his prom tux waiting in the rain for the hottest girl in the school that will never show up, even though she told him she would pick him up b/c she was really into him and would love to go to prom with him?
We shall see. I guess one can only attempt so many times with one person. If this is some dumb game, I do not want to play. I like when people keep it real. But if she’s not that into me, that’s fine. I can accept that and move on.
Word of advice to girls, don’t keep guys on a leash. It feels good for you… its a crutch; a source of comfort, but it is probably one of the meanest things you could do to someone.
Be honest. If it’s not working out, tell him so. Be honest, but tactful. No excuses. Don’t tell him you just don’t have time right now and let him cling to the glimmer of hope. We’ve all seen Dumb and Dumber. Not cool.
Don’t tell him you still want to be friends. Cut the chain and let him live in freedom. And if you are just plain scared, really do like him, and are not sure if he really likes you…don’t push him away to see if he comes back. If you are really looking to test him, here is the ultimate and the only necessary one: don’t wear any make up for one day and see if he comes back. Maybe even do it for a week. If he sees you in your rawest form and is still into you. You are stupid for letting him go.
I stopped by her room once to surprise her and she happened to be getting ready for bed and was make-up less…I was blown away. She was so beautiful and kept apologizing for “looking horrible”. Little did she know, I thought she was the prettiest girl in the world that night. Her face was radiant and graceful. Her eyes revealed depths of wonder that had been hidden all this time. I wish she could see herself through both of my eyes.
I have many more thoughts…maybe this discussion on relationships and “love” will be a series of posts…more to come
3 Comments
April 3, 2008 at 12:24 pm
You have a heart of Christ that is in need of a heart that is congruent in your maturity and love that you give. You’ll find love. And she’ll be great. And if not, you can always go to the library and hang out with Pringles… once you pop, the fun don’t stop.
April 4, 2008 at 11:15 pm
I can totally relate to all aspects of this post as i’m sure you know. I totally agree without Bjorn too that when the right girl is revealed she is gonna be blow your mind awesome and i’m even pumped about it. Its what we have to hope for, and I don’t think that theres anything in hoping. I know God is gonna rock my world as a single girl or as a married girl one day, so i’m pumped either way, but i would lie if i said i didn’t hope too.
p.s. Word of advice to guys, don’t keep girls on a leash. It feels good for you…its a crutch; a source of comfort, but it is probably one of the meanest things you could do to someone.
guys suck too, fyi.
April 9, 2008 at 2:26 pm
Hey my name is D.O. and I recently posted a comment on your post about Shane Claiborne telling you about Another World is Possible. Well I’ve just got one more thing I wanted to tell you about and then I’ll leave you alone. The folks who made the AWIP DVD’s are making a feature-length documentary called “The Ordinary Radicals.” The film will address many of the negative stereotypes that are affiliated with present-day Christianity, and tell the stories of ordinary folks who are disproving these generalizations. People doing pretty amazing things, motivated by their faith. I think you should check it out. Interviews include folks like Shane Claiborne, Rob Bell, Brian McLaren, Ron Sider, Becky Garrison, and a whole host of others. If you’d like to learn more or pre-order the DVD, check out the website at http://www.theordinaryradicals.com.
Oh, and realize that this has nothing to do with your post, but I couldn’t find a “contact” link anywhere to email you. Hope you don’t mind.